i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
