I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I showed him my bush... on skype.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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