They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize