Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
smell my finger.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
