so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
