before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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