This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
