I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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