ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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