I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
