Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Your penis caused this!
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