whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
She swung at the pinata with crutches
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
