is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize