Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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