I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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