I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I will pee on everything he values.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I want to be your penis for a week.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
