it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
