FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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