so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
