I got chris browned last night
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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