so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
