can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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