brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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