her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
