You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize