it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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