Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
The air taste purple.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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