I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
