I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
