Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
