Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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