do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
