No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm getting married
To pizza
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
