dude i'm inner monologue high
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
