i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
