I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
