Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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