just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
