I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You can't motorboat a personality
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize