I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize