He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
