I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
