Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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