mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
