Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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