i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
