Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
