Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
