he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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