Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
