Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
